THE WIFE

Tik..tik....uhhhhh

2005-05-26T08:15:00.000-07:00

Nenek itu tertidur begitu pulasnya seakan ingin melupakan beban yang bertumpuk dipikarannya. Oh wajahnya yang letih itu..seakan ingin memberitahukan dunia akan perjuangan hidup yang telah dia tempuh…..hujan, angin, kecaman dari orang-orang sekitar yang selalu ingin saja merebut apa yang telah dia perjuangkan…tik…tak terasa air mata ini jatuh……..Nek seberat itukah liku hidup yang telah engkau jalani? Maukah kau berbagi? Seakan tak adil bagi aku yang masih muda mengeluh akan hidup ini…seakan tak pernah tahu bahwa mereka yang telah begitu lebih dulu berjuang dalam hidup ini tak pernah mengeluhkan apa yang mereka alami……mereke simpan sendiri apa yang mereka rasakan…sedangkan aku….ih begitu…..menyebalkan…..sedikit saja pilu yang terasa menyayat hati……aku langsung ambruk..berkeluh kesah…tak tau rasa bersyukur dan menikmati hidup.

Mata itu terbuka seakan ingin memastikan bahwa dia telah sampai pada tempat yang akan dituju....dan mata itu......ada rasa lelah disana....ya betapa tidak, telah beberapa kali aku bertemu dia, aku perhatikan nenek itu selalu membawa pikulan yang terlihat cukup berat bagi seorang nenek. Dengan memeluk pikulannya nenek tertidur lagi..begitu erat dia memeluk pikulannya seakan pikulan itu adalah teman setianya dalam mendampingi kekejaman dunia ini. Ah ada rasa aneh dalam hati ini..kenapa sosoknya mengingatkan ku pada mendiang ibuku? Sudahlah..tapi..hei aku kangen padanya..ibu..aku kangen.....rasa ini begitu kuat......

Surat Untuk Ima

2005-05-19T14:20:00.000-07:00

Pagi itu ketika aku berkata 'do you know what?' I miss you:)
Ketika itu ada seorang perempuan yang memiliki khas ima duduk disudut angkot yang aku tumpangi...... Entah tiba - tiba rasa kangen itu menyelinap di hati ini...
Maka berdatanganlah kilas balik bersama ima and ami....

Ipunk...
si Penulis itu sepertinya belum ada tanda-tanda bukunya akan terbit.... selama dalam proses penulisan sepertinya ada beda pendapat yang sangat prinsipil dengan penerbitnya..entahlah...tapi sepertinya dia tetap bersemangat tuk terus dan terus menulis

Cinta..entah kapan dia datang tuk membuka dunia halusinasiku..
Meski aku tau orang- orang terdekatku dengan cara mereka sendiri menunjukan betapa mereka ingin aku segera memiliki 'seseorang'.....

Tapi aku pikir-pikir..wajarlah jika mereka bersikap seperti...
Yang bisa aku lakukan hanyalah pasrah, menunggu that prince charming datang:)

Waspada Tipuan Syetan

2005-02-21T11:30:00.000-08:00

Alhamdulillaahirabbil'aalamiin, Allahuma shalli 'ala Muhammad wa'ala aalihi washahbihii ajmai'iin.

Saudaraku yang budiman, salah satu makhluk Allah yang senatiasa kita waspadai adalah syetan laknatullah. Betapa tidak, walau setan tidak nampak wujudnya, tidak nyata terlihat oleh indra kita, namun hasil perbuatannya sungguh riil membuat manusia menderita, sengsara dunia akhirat. Karena syetan tidak punya tugas lain kecuali menjerumuskan, menyuruh manusia kepada kemungkaran dan perbuatan yang tidak diridhai Allah, terutama melalui hawa nafsu manusia.

Banyak yang telah menjadi korban tipu muslihatnya, mengikuti hawa nafsu duniawi termasuk diri kita. Memang kadangkala kita mampu menahan bisikan itu, namun saat kita lengah mustahil kita terjebak tipuan syetan.Saudaraku, syetan sangat senang menyuruh kita agar mengumbar nikmat secara berlebihan.

Syetan membisik kita agar menuruti nafsu syahwat, walaupun haram. Begitu pula dengan nikmat lainya, seperti makan, ia selalu memenuhi segala keinginannya untuk melahap semua jenis makanan yang enak-enak, tidak peduli halal atau haram, yang penting perutnya terpuaskan. Segala dorongan syetan ini mensyaratkan kita untuk hati-hati terhadap keinginan, kehendak yang didasari nafsu semata, kita harus betul-betul bertanya pada diri, ini kebutuhan atau hanya nafsu saja. Mudah-mudahan dengan berupaya sangat menjaga diri, kita dilindungi Allah dari segala hal yang tidak disukai-Nya. Wallahu a'lam bish shawab

http://www.cybermq.com/cybermq/detail_mataair.php?idm=25&noidm=4

Aristotle's List of Emotions

2005-01-19T09:30:00.000-08:00

Anger: An impulse to revenge that shall be evident, and caused by an obvious,
unjustified slight with respect to the individual or his friends. Slights have three
species: contempt, spite, and insolence.

Mildness: The settling down and quieting of anger.

Love: Wishing for a person those things which you consider to be good—wishing them
for his sake and not your own--and tending so far as you can to affect them.

Enmity (hatred): Whereas anger is excited by offences that concern the individual,
enmity may arise without regard to the individual as such. Anger is directed
against the individual, hatred is directed against the class as well.

Fear: A pain or disturbance arising from a mental image of impending evil of a painful
or destructive sort.

Confidence: The opposite of fear. Confidence is the hope (anticipation), accompanied
by a mental image, of things conducive to safety as being near at hand, while
causes of fear seem to be either non-existent or far away.

Shame: A pain or disturbance regarding that class of evils, in the present, past, or future,
which we think will tend to our discredit.

Shamelessness: A certain contempt or indifference regarding the said evils.

Benevolence: The emotion toward disinterested kindness in doing or returning good to
another or to all others; the same term represents the kind action as an action; or
the kind thing done considered as a result.

Pity: A sense of pain at what we take to be an evil of a destructive or painful kind, which
befalls one who does not deserve it, which we think we ourselves or some one
allied to us might likewise suffer, and when this possibility seems near at hand.

Indignation: A pain at the sight of undeserved good fortune.

Envy: A disturbing pain directed at the good fortune of an equal. The pain is felt not
because one desires something, but because the other persons have it.

Emulation: A pain at what we take to be the presence, in the case. of persons who are by
nature like us, of goods that are desirable and are possible for us to attain--a pain
felt, not because the other persons have these goods, but because we do not have them as well.

Contempt: The antithesis of emulation (Persons who are in a position to emulate or to be
emulated must tend to feel contempt for those who are subject to any evils [defects and
disadvantages] that are opposite to the goods arousing emulation, and to feel it with
respect to these evils).

spot.colorado.edu/~hauserg/ArEmotList.htm

How to Express Difficult Feelings

2005-01-18T18:42:00.000-08:00

Feelings Versus Thoughts and Beliefs

Feelings and thoughts are different, but also are one and the same. They are like the head and tail of a coin. We react to events with both thoughts and feelings. Feelings are emotions, and sensations, and they are different from thoughts, beliefs, interpretations, and convictions. When difficult feelings are expressed, the sharp edges are dulled, and it is easier to release or let go of the bad feeling. If we only express our beliefs about the event and not the feelings, the bad feelings linger and are often harder to release. Whenever someone says, "I feel that..." the person is about to express a belief, not a feeling.

Guidelines For Expressing Feelings

Try to be specific rather than general about how you feel. Consistently using only one or two words to say how you are feeling, such as bad or upset, is too vague and general. What kind of bad or upset? (irritated, mad, anxious, afraid, sad, hurt, lonely, etc.).
Specify the degree of the feelings, and you will reduce the chances of being misunderstood. For example, some people may think when you say, "I am angry" means you are extremely angry when you actually mean a "little irritated".
When expressing anger or irritation, first describe the specific behavior you don’t like, then your feelings. This helps to prevent the other person from becoming immediately defensive or intimidated when they first hear "I am angry with you", and they could miss the message.
If you have mixed feelings, say so, and express each feeling and explain what each feeling is about. For example: "I have mixed feelings about what you just did. I am glad and thankful that you helped me, but I didn’t like the comment about being stupid. It was disrespectful and unnecessary and I found it irritating".

Techniques for Expressing Feelings

The two following - I feel statements and I messages will help you:
Express feelings productively.
Respectfully confront someone when you are bothered by his or her behavior.
Express difficult feelings without attacking the self-esteem of the person.
Clarify for you and the other person precisely what you feel.
Prevent feelings from building up and festering into a bigger problem.
Communicate difficult feelings in a manner that minimizes the other person’s need to become defensive, and increases the likelihood that the person will listen.
When you first start using these techniques they will be cumbersome and awkward to apply, and not very useful if you only know them as techniques. However, if you practice these techniques and turn them into skills, it will be easy for you to express difficult feelings in a manner that is productive and respectful.
Which of the two methods you use for expressing your feelings should depend on your goal, the importance or difficulty of your feelings and the situation.

I feel statements are used in situations that are clear and fairly simple, when you what to express yourself and avoid a buildup of feelings without attacking or hurting the self-esteem of the other.
I messages are used in more complex situations to clarify for yourself and the other person just what you are feeling when a) you have difficult negative feelings, b) you confront someone and want them to change their behavior, and c) it is very sensitive and important that the other person accurately understand.

I Feel Statements

These statements take the form of "When you did that thing I felt this way. That thing is a behavior of the other person, and this way is your specific feelings. Here are some examples:
"I felt embarrassed when you told our friends how we are pinching pennies."
"I liked it when you helped with the dishes without being asked."
"I feel hurt and am disappointed that you forgot our anniversary".

I Messages

It is called an I message because the focus is on you, and the message is about yourself. This is in contrast to a You message which focuses on and gives a message about the other person. When using I messages you take responsibility for your own feelings, rather than accusing the other person of making you feel a certain way. A You message does not communicate a feeling, but a belief about the other person. The essence of an I message is "I have a problem", while the essence of a You message is "You have a problem".
There are four parts to an I message:
When ... Describe the person’s behavior you are reacting to in an objective, non-blameful, and non-judgmental manner.
The effects are ... Describe the concrete or tangible effects of that behavior. (This is the most important part for the other person to understand - your reaction.)
I feel ... Say how you feel. (This is the most important part to prevent a buildup of feelings.)
I’d prefer ... Tell the person what you want or what you prefer they do. You can omit this part if it is obvious.
The order in which you express these parts is usually not important. Here are some examples:
" When you take company time for your personal affairs and then don’t have time to finish the urgent work I give you, I get furious. I want you to finish the company’s work before you work on your personal affairs."
"I lose my concentration when you come in to ask a question, and I don’t like it. Please don’t interrupt me when I am working unless it is urgent."
"It is very hard for me to keep our place neat and clean when you leave your clothes and other stuff laying around. It creates a lot more work for me and it takes a lot longer, and I get resentful about it. I’d prefer that you put your clothes away and put your trash in the basket."
"I resent it when your flirting with the women keeps you from having time for your work, because it means more work for me."

Common Mistakes

Not expressing a feeling at all, expressing a belief or judgment.
Sending a disguised You message.
Only expressing negative feelings.
The nonverbal body language contradicting the words. For example, smiling when irritated.
Practice these techniques and turn them into useful skills. Make it easy for yourself to spontaneously express difficult feelings in a manner that is productive and respectful.

www.drnadig.com/feelings.htm

KETIKA

2005-01-03T23:21:00.000-08:00

Ketika teman sendiri telah memandang negatif pada kita apalagi yang harus dilakukan... Ruang terasa sempit ..... seribu kata telah mewakili kata maaf.. namun dia tetap saja mempertanyakan "diam" ku itu ... Lelah .... sudah hilangkah hak ku untuk melakukan sesuatu atas namaku sendiri??? Tak sangka ternyata perbuatanku menyimpan luka ... kenapa?? Dia bilang caraku salah .. Aku terima ... ya .. Aku salah .. Tapi apakah kata maaf tak cukup?????
Dia berubah semenjak itu, aku masih menganggap wajar.. dia begitu terluka.. Hingga pada suatu malam .. dadaku sesak oleh tangis yang begitu pedih ... aku tidak tenang .. Lumuran dosa yang begitu banyak terlintas dimataku ... dan tiba-tiba aku mengambil handphone ku dan mulai mengetik untaian kata ... "aku bisa tenang kalo kau memaafkanku", lama kunanti jawaban darinya.. akhirnya sms itu berbunyi ... "tenanglah aku telah memaafkanmu" seketika itu juga badan ku terasa ringan, sesak itu hilang ... dahsyat sekali ..

Tally of Foreigners Killed in Tsunamis

2004-12-31T23:30:00.000-08:00

The tally of foreigners confirmed dead from the quake and tsunamis throughout southern Asia, according to their countries' foreign ministries. Authorities said hundreds more are missing and feared dead. Thai authorities said 473 foreigners from 36 nations were confirmed dead from Thailand's southern resorts alone.
_ Sweden: 44
_ Germany: 33
_ Britain: 27
_ France: 22
_ Norway: 21
_ Japan: 15
_ United States: 14
_ Italy: 14
_ Switzerland: 12
_ Australia: 10
_ Denmark: 7
_ Singapore: 7
_ Netherlands: 5
_ Austria: 5
_ Belgium: 5
_ Finland: 4
_ South Korea: 4
_ South Africa: 4
_ Canada: 3
_ Brazil: 2
_ Philippines: 1
_ Poland: 1
_ Russia: 1
_ Colombia: 1
_ Taiwan: 2
_ New Zealand: 1

AFP · Reuters · AP
Friday December 31, 11:22 AM

Words of Wisdom

2004-12-31T11:55:00.000-08:00

Today before you think of saying an unkind word
Think of someone who can't speak

Before you complain about the taste of your food
Think of someone who has nothing to eat

Before you complain about your husband or wife
Think of someone who's crying out to GOD for a companion

Today before you complain about life
Think of someone who went too early to heaven

Before you complain about your children
Think of someone who desires children but they're barren

Before you argue about your dirty house someone didn't clean or sweep
Think of the people who are living in the streets

Before whinning about the distance you drive
Think of someone who walks the same distance with their feet

And when you are tired and complain about your job
Think of the unemployed, the disabled and those who wished they had your job

But before you think of pointing the finger or condemning another
Remember that not one of us are without sin and we all answer to one maker

And when depressing thoughts seem to get you down
Put a smile on your face and thank GOD you're alive and still around

Life is a gift
Live it
Enjoy it
Celebrate it
And fulfill it

HAVE A BLESSING DAY!

2004-12-29T21:51:00.000-08:00

2004-12-29T20:10:00.000-08:00